OK. Officially, do not play with phone scammers. The US government says so.
You may not be surprised that I do not always do what I am supposed to do, or not supposed to do.
As a self-published author, I receive frequent spam and probably scam calls. I actually answer them, partly because I have an emergency phone that doesn’t have Caller-ID. I mine the experiences for benefits.
I do employ some protections. Basically, I never say anything like my name, or ‘yes’, or anything committal. That takes practice, which some consider dangerous. I’m also willing to hang up rudely if I make a mistake. That practice has served me well when talking to real salespeople, too.
My motivations are many.
I am a curious fellow. – It is usually a person on the other end of the call. People fascinate me. Why are they doing what they are doing? What is their motivation? That’s not just a question for fictional characters. Real people have real motivations. Sometimes, I will ask them how they get paid: is it by the hour, because I answered, or by the length of time they’re on the call, or is it only if they make a sale. Sometimes, I connect with someone who just desperately needs a job, but that is rare. It does tend to confuse them, though, because I took them off-topic and actually recognized them as a real person. They invariably get back on script, but how they do that is an interesting study.
It has been good training for my negotiating skills. – No. I do not expect to outmaneuver them. I have, however, gotten better at sticking to my position rather than being maneuvered by them. Don’t say yes, but I am more likely to say no assertively. Interrupt them rudely if they are interrupting me rudely. That confuses them, too. It is even better practice at interrupting them graciously. Is that a spiritual practice?
Diversionary tactics – For every minute they are speaking to me, they are not speaking to someone who might fall into their trap. The trick, of course, is not to fall into their trap. Bonus points if you’ve made them fall into yours. Which leads to…
Reverse cold calling – Congratulations if you’ve never had to do cold calling, calling strangers and trying to sell them something. I’ve never done it. As a real estate broker, I saw it used and wouldn’t use it. Maybe that’s one reason I didn’t make it as a real estate broker. But. When an – alleged – scam publishing company called, I’d turn the call back on them. They wanted to talk about re-publishing one of my books; I’d try selling them a house, or my consulting services, or my photos, or anything besides my books.
Lonely – You know, working from home, especially lately, can be lonely. I’ll thank them for calling because I wanted to have someone to talk to. See Diversionary tactics above.
Material – Writers know, everything can be material. This is material that delivered itself. Thanks.
The Real Deal – Let’s assume they aren’t scammers. It happens. Early in my writing career, self-publishing benefited from ‘supportive self-publishers’. I paid them a fee to create the cover, format the book, and get it into distribution channels. That’s not as necessary now. But they taught me something about myself and my books. Here comes the longer section, so prepare for a few paragraphs.
As an example, my ‘publisher’ offered me an advertising package that would cost ~$2,000. My contract with them was for such a low royalty that I made ~$1 per book. I pointed out that they’d make much more than $1 per book. Because their potential profit was higher, they should cover more of the cost of the package. They pointed out that they had to cover their expenses as well, of course. So do I. I’d have to sell 2,000 books to get back up to break-even. Along the way, I suspect they’d make a profit, as most businesses would. I said no. They’ve offered that package several times. To me, it represents a shift in their business from making money from selling books to making money from selling packages to authors.
One ‘movie deal’ said they thought my book was good enough to become a movie that could make millions. All I had to do was: 1) write them a screenplay, 2) invest ~$200,000, though maybe only ~$100,000. Imagine what I could do with $100,000. I could hire a screenwriter and a publicist.
Those two examples have multiple variations and episodes. They taught me to switch my perspective as I switched calls into reverse cold-calls. Most of these calls start with flattering compliments about how good my books are. They’ll even refer to their agents who’ve reviewed my books as good candidates for their services. All I have to do, according to them, is send them several hundred dollars, or maybe a few thousand dollars. Whether they are right or wrong, their approach deserves to be flipped.
If they sincerely think my content is worth publishing or publicizing or producing – then pay me for it. Offer to pay me $200,000 for the book rights. Advertise the book and pay us both with the increased book sales. Dangle the money in front of me, rather than asking me to open my accounts to pay them. (Incidentally, the book they chose was a non-fiction book about personal finance, not exactly a source of plot.)
At this point, I admit to another bit of honesty. I honestly expected to receive a call from one of them as I typed this. I’m not complaining. Whew. I have, however, created a log of their calls. Name of caller, name of business, date, book of interest, price of their package, etc. They don’t call every day. It just feels that way. There are days when I get several, and thanks to keeping a log I can refer them back to themselves by asking what has changed since the last time they called. Have they improved their offer to me?
My favorite recent call was from a call center where I could barely hear the caller because there were so many calls going on in the background. I listened. I took my notes. Eventually, I hung up. A few hours later, I got a call from the same company, about the same book, for the same package, from a person whose voice I recognized as part of the previous background.
They are people, and probably under a lot of stress. This is not a life-fulfilling job. I don’t press it. They can easily turn unpleasant. One got nasty when I pointed out errors in their description of my book. (I don’t educate them on how to properly pronounce my name because it is a giveaway for recognizing them.) I feel sorry for them as people, but have no emotional remorse about their businesses.
When I hear about defense spending paying for another aircraft carrier, I wonder if it would cost less to defend people from criminals who steal billions of dollars.
I’ll close by sending you back to the top of this post where there’s a link to the Consumer Protection page of the US Federal Trade Commission. I am sure there are other official sites, including within other countries for non-US readers. As I wrote above, I pick up, but I’ve had to train myself to employ protections. The simplest protection, however is,
tomthewriter.com 
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